Emerging from the Cave of Doom and Gloom: Contemplating a Significant Day

Today is September 11; a sad day of remembrance for many people, but my reason is a little different. It's been a month to the day since my dad died and every day the emotions and realizations are different and raw. The first week I was certainly numb, which was helpful in being a rock for my family, overseeing all of the preparations so no one else had to. The second week, when I returned from Indiana, I was angry, resentful and lost, doing very little beyond watching TV and sleeping. Last week, I started making decisions again, missing my friends and my life. This week, I've made leaps in rejoining the human race, both joining the SCA and becoming the likely candidate for the East Bay representative to the SF IU Alumni Association. Yesterday, I was inexplicably, explosively sad, yet ended up shaking hands with Michael McRobbie, the president of IU and of whom I am a total fangirl (I also met his wife, who is an exquisite lady). Today, I am quietly thoughtful and gearing up to hang out with new SCA folks tonight. Some days I feel really pathetic, but stepping back like this, I think I'm doing remarkably well. Each day is a process and I've just got to embrace the flow, recognizing that some days will be much harder than others.

In regards to that other reason today is significant, I can't believe it's already been 7 years. The way the politicians and pundits keep talking about and summoning fear over it, you'd think it happened last week. Though what happened was tragic and I don't mean to be callous, we as a country need to move on. Every mourning period must evolve for it to be a healing process, but we keep getting sucked back into the yearly loop of desperation and fear. For the people who lost loved ones in World Trade Center attacks, I'm obviously not talking to you, but the rest of us need to let the true mourners have their sadness and we need to move on in regards to foreign policy and homeland security goals. It's tremendous that we have not had another attack since then, but this culture of fear and anxiety is an unhealthy atmosphere to raise a society and it has clouded our judgment on issues like the economy and funding for education. There are other ways to prove our strength as a country that have nothing to do with our military. I hope as this election cycle draws closer to the big dance, the country's eyes can be opened to the possibility of a new day without fear. Be well, America.